July 7, 2003 Thomas Kinkaid-aholics Anonymous & Westlife vs. A Package Of Mini-Cocktail Wieners

Dear Ken!, My name is John, I am 19 and i have a problem... I have been married for a year and 3 months and now she is telling me that she thinks we would have made better friends than a married couple. This hurts me severly and i cant do anything but go numb and shut it out. I love her unconrolably and she loves me as well, but doesnt want to be stuck in this relationship if i am not the one she wants to be with... what the hell should i do, Ken? John

Dear John, If the years I've spent in Thomas Kinkaid-aholics Anonymous meetings taught me anything, it's that the first step to overcoming a problem is accepting it for what it is. (That was a long, hard road for me but now I can pass one of the seemingly thousands of Thomas Kinkaid "Art Galleries" without getting dry mouth. Now I just feel like I'm going to vomit.) Take it from someone who's been around your block: you can let something like this ruin you or you face reality, find ways to cope with what goes down, learn your lessons and come out of this a better person. What next? Start trying to find out exactly what she means when she says you two would make better friends. Have you raised this question with her at a time of your choosing? Ken!

Dear Ken!, I'm 23 Married and gave a 5 month baby daughter. My parents rencently bought us a trailer when they found out I was having the baby so that I could live close to them and have room for our daughter. My brother who is 28 recently got out of jail. He has moved in with us because my mother and father also had plans for this to be a place for him. The thing is, my brother likes to be little me some times by saying things that make me sad. My husband and him will go in the living room smoke and saythings to me that make me really sad. Some how things are said that always make me and my husband get into an argurment. STUPID things. Like today my brother was making plans to bring over 2 girls over to have sex with, and he wants them to spend time in our livingroom where they can sit and laugh and have a nice little party. These girls, at least one of them is really not nice. She was going out with him before he went to jail and then she broke up with him because she went back with her ex boyfriend while he went to jail. I told him he should do all these things in there homes since, he only has a room here and it would be nasty and I would feel out of place in my home having women like that here. I know he will not stay only in his room with them. He is making my house into a room by pretty much forcing me to stay in my room while he has bimbos over. When I got mad at him for this because this is not a situation I want my family to be in my husband got mad and said I am being a bitch of a sister. SO now we are not on speaking terms for the fact he was in the livingroom laughing it up with my brother and they were both saying things about me. I called my mom and dad crying, they said I was out of line, my brother can do anything with who ever he wants to in this house, even if that means there boyfriends will come over wanting to beat my brother up for sleeping around with such trashy women. So my mom just said, if they bring anything like alcohol or drugs then i can tell to leave other than that I have to grin and bare it. Oh and I can call the police if there boyfriends come over. This is so crazy! What sould I do? Really mad and upset

Unless a person is raised by barn animals, common sense and courtesy dictates that a home with a child that age meet certain requirements for healthy growth. Now I'm certainly no Miss Manners or an adherent of hers or anything but it's absolutely improper and unhealthy for people to be smoking around a baby. I don't care much either way about the good time gals your brother has over but everyone in the household should respect the needs of the others, including the baby. Is this going to happen in your household? No, because your husband, your brother and very likely both your parents are inconsiderate assholes. I know it's hard to hear but people with any kind of respect for themselves and those around them wouldn't have treated you and your baby in such a manner. Since the household is technically both yours I recommend you strike a compromise with your brother: you won't fuss about the company he keeps as long as there's no drinking, smoking or drugs in the house and everyone keeps quiet when the baby is sleeping. Ken!

Dear Ken! Ken, Where can I get pictures of Westlife naked>? Westlifeg4evax

Dear Westlifeg4evax, I have to admit that I didn't know who Westlife was. Now, thanks to the internet, I will never be able to reclaim the minutes I lost visiting their website nor the blissful ignorance of this group I now sorely miss. If you've never heard or heard of Westlife, they're just like the hundreds of other producer-created nasally pussy-pop bands on the scene these days. The only discernable difference is that they're Irish. Considering what I've heard of Irish men, the closest approximation to real nude photos of Westlife would be a package of mini-cocktail wieners. Come to think of it, they sound about that talented, too. Ken!

WHY WOULD A GUY TELL YOU HE LOVES YOU (I DIDN'T RECIPROCATE) BECAUSE ALTHOUGH I CARE ABOUT HIM AND IS ATTRACTED TO HIM I NEED TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM IN ORDER TO SAY THE "L" WORD. HE'S BEEN STUDYING TO GET A MEDICAL LICENSE SO WE HAVEN'T BEEN SPENDING A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER (HAVE BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER FOR APPRX 9MNTHS ON AND OFF)THEN HE DISAPPEARS FOR 2 MONTHS. CALLS SPORADICALLY.. THEN SHOWS UP AT MY JOB UNANNOUNCED TO LET ME KNOW THAT HE'S BEEN SEEING SOMEONE ELSE. THEN WHEN MY RESPONSE WAS..I'LL BE OK. HE SAYS THAT HE KNOWS THAT I WILL BE OK THEN ASKS ME IF I HAVE BEEN SEEING SOMEONE ELSE AS WELL..MY RESPONSE WAS NO..QUIZZICAL LOOK ON HIS FACE (HE'S LATIN) CONFUSED GIRL NEEDS SOME MALE/FEMALE IMPUT THANKS SRJ

Jesus honey, lay off the shift key! All the shouting makes me feel like I'm back at the group home. Next time you stop by be sure to use your indoor voice (aka, turn off your caps lock). I passed your question around at a small party a friend was having and here was the tally: (Out of 10 total) Six said he dropped by to bid you farewell and the quizzical look was surprise upon hearing that you weren't seeing anyone else. Three described him as a bumbling fool who doesn't appear to know what he wants. One went on in great detail about the fantastic colors pouring from the tips of his shoelaces. (He had taken LSD earlier in the day.) Take your pick. It's just like that one game show where you can solicit the vote of the audience. Except here you don't win any money. And it's not televised. And the questions pertain to matters of the heart. Those details aside, it's exactly the same. Ken!

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