September 16, 2002 Politics, Penises & Poon-Tang

Dear Ken!, I'm angry. I am so angry that at times I can barely breathe. I am angry at the stupidity of the human race. I am angry that I can see such beautiful potential in everyone around me, I am angry that it has been a year since last September and as a country we have learned nothing. In fact we seem to have forgotten many of the things we knew, like basic human rights. I am angry that the U.S. armed forces can bomb the fuck out of another country, place a former Halliburton exec in office, help rebuild said country, but can't feed everyone at home. I am angry that I am losing the fight for decent healthcare for the people I love. I have tries therapy several times and living better through pharmaceuticals, but these aren't the kind of things I can just fix. Anger leads to action, but does not heal itself. Anyway, I wrote to let your reader form Germany that he should read INDIAN KILLER and anything else by Sherman Alexie. All the rest of that stuff just came out. An Angry and Avid reader

Dear AAAAR, Some call Dubya's interest in Iraq is politically motivated but I don't agree. To me it's business decision. How else would a Texas businessman average in intelligence and appearance manage to become President of the United States? (I'm sure the fact that he shares the same moniker as his father didn't hurt him with the witless fool and Metamucil demographics.) Who has the most to gain from the defeat of Saddam Hussein? The possibility of war with Iraq has already driven up oil prices; a war would further inflate prices. And who benefits from high oil prices? Oil companies and oil executives-- all of Dubya's pals from his days in prep school. If Saddam is overthrown you know a U.S. friendly government will magically spring up from nowhere and begin selling oil rights to the oil companies and Dubya's dorm buddies. These self-serving business tactics makes Enron and WorldCom and Tyco seem like a bunch of first-graders cheating on a spelling test. Thanks for reading suggestion. I'll have to check that out after I finish watching The Complete Three's Company DVD Compendium (with a spread of Mrs. Roper on the inside cover). Ken!

Dear Ken!, hi well when i was small i got my teeth knocked out with a softball and i had to get dentures when i give head could that effect the feeling it has on the guy then me not having it like other people. worried :(

Dear worried colon left parenthesis, Cocks are not prehensile tails or fingers-- they aren't sensitive enough to discern individual teeth in the human mouth (although it's easy to tell when a dog's fangs are chomping into your sausage, I'll tell ya). And for what it counts every woman is uniquely different in how they suck it. It's whether you're both enjoying it is what counts. Ken!

Dear Ken!, It's been just over one year now since 9-11, and that means the anniversary of our war against the Al-Quaida is upon us. This also means that we began taking prisoners of war about one year ago. What's happened to them? Are they still locked up in Guantananmo Bay, Cuba? Has everyone forgot that these people exist? Wondering & Befuddled

Dear Wondering & Befuddled, "Guantanamo? Wasn't he one of the final contestants on America Idol? Now that you mention it I do recall something about some people in Cuba but I'm sure whatever they did they deserve to be there. I mean, if you haven't done anything wrong what does a person have to fear?" Maybe we should ask Dr. Steven Hatfill for an answer to that last question. Ken!

Dear Ken!, My boyfriend and I have great sex but he has never eaten my pussy! He always whops his wollabuddie in my mouth but has never snuggle the pussy. How can I get him to repay the favour. If it doesnt happen soon, I'll bite his dick off next time he shoves it in my mouth!!!! Pining

Dear Pining, If he continues whopping his wollabuddie in your mouth while never snuggling the pussy perhaps you should egrec a bindletwangler, shlip it on and whop it in his mouth. Or push him onto his back and pretend his face is your own pretty little pony. Giddyup! Ken!

Hi Ken, The problem is that when i and my husband have sex, i discharge for a short time . The problem is that i want him to fuck me till i am satisfied. The moment he puts his cock in my pussy i feel great but very soon i get discharged and then sex is over why cant this discharge be for a long time cause when u i get discharged i catch his cock tight so that it doesnt leave till i fully finish. can u please help me out that i want the discharge tobe atleast for half an hour so i enjoy with him fully. Barbara

Dear Readers, Ultimately I'm not sure what advice Barbara seeks. I read through this question several times while replacing the word "discharge" with various other words and none of it ever made logical sense. But some of the substitute words made the question rather fun. Try some of these or think of your own: Orgasm Tired Headache Discharged Promoted to First Lieutenant Vomit Vote for Bush Ken!

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